Simplify

I heard recently that happiness is not a destination, it is a mood. I think I have been searching for happiness in all the wrong places, recently. My goal here is to get back down to basics and really treasure the things in my life that make me the happiest.

The verse that keeps echoing in my head is this one: "Be still and know that I am God." Psalms 46:10. Be still...take in the day....relax and cherish the little things...Be still....ahhh...How refreshing it is to be still and let God lead me in my day and in my decisions and activities.

So I asked, "What are the most important things to me?" Or, "Where should my priorities lie?" Of course, I would say in this order:

God

Brent

Savannah and Parker

These are my responsibilities. I do not believe I am a bad parent or wife or Christian, for that matter. However, I do believe that I have filled my days with so much that it has gotten chaotic and in turn, I do a lot, but do nothing well. Some moms can go go go all day long and everything they do, they can put in 100%, or so it seems. I tend to judge myself on how I perform based on how well they handle the tasks of their day. I'll be honest. I do not have tons of energy. If I fill my day with two play dates, school drop off, bible study, preparing dinner, cleaning the house, spending time with the kids, and spending time with the husband, there is NO way all of that is getting done....well, not the way it should anyway. I tend to find myself flaking out on responsibilities because I am overwhelmed with the number of thing I try to accomplish during the day.

I know a lot of moms go through this, but I have decided to make some changes so that I can be better at the things that are most important to me. I want to lessen commitments, lessen social distractions, and focus my energy into my marriage and kids.

So, how am I doing this? Well, I am really just starting, but I have some ideas. I am quitting Facebook, so I can dedicate more of my attention to my house chores, to Savannah, to reading the Bible, etc. Instead of spending my "free" time while Parker is napping on Facebook, I want to spend it doing something that matters. I have tried to limit myself, but I am not very good at it. I figured the only way to really stop getting on is to get rid of it. I am also going to start limiting our social gatherings to two or three a week. One extracurricular activity and a couple of play dates is more than enough stimulation for these kiddos. I want to do more fun activities at the house like crafts and reading, etc. I want to spend my day getting the house in order and chores, etc. taken care of so that when the kids go to bed and Brent is home, we can spend quality time together. If I can successfully master those responsibilities, then I will give what I have left to everything else. I feel like it has been the opposite for a while. I feel like many things have come before my family and my walk with Christ. There are several things that I have been so consumed with and I am so ready to release them and focus on what really matters to me. At the end of the day, I have four people (God included) in this house that love me unconditionally, so why wouldn't I want to give them my best? I often times find myself giving my best to everyone else, and often times find myself getting hurt or being disappointed when any less is given to me.

I was reading something the other day and it was talking about memories your children have of you. One thing that really stood out to me was that I NEVER want my children to look back at their childhood and think, "My mommy was too busy for me." It made me think of all the times I am in the middle of something and one of them will come up to me and say, "Mommy, will you do ________ with me?" and I will respond, "Not right now. I will in a few minutes." Then, the end of the day comes along and I hadn't ever gotten around to doing those things they had asked me to do.

Things are going to change around here. I am going to be still. I am going to simplify.

Because I love to write and share our lives with you, I am going to work really hard to narrate our story with you on this blog instead of Facebook. It is so fun telling the stories of our days with all of you.

What an exciting time this will be!!